Snark

8 Reasons to Love Your Introverted Friend

I make no bones about it.  I am an introvert.  I prefer a night alone, doing my own thing to just Quiet is might.Solitude isabout any other option.  My husband and many, if not most, of my friends are extroverts.  They enjoy people and networking and always being in the spotlight.  It took them years to realize that the spotlight is the last place I want to be.  Once they realized that I wasn’t like them, they began to see that introverted people make some of the best company.

Here’s a list of eight reasons you should love your introverted friend.

1.  They are low maintenance.

Seriously.  They don’t require your constant attention.  Consider them the cats of the human world.  As long as they have what they need, they are pretty quiet, content people.  You could literally not speak to them for weeks and not only will you not damage your friendship, they probably won’t even notice that you weren’t speaking to them.

2.  No matter what, life is almost always calm around them.

Introverts don’t like drama or noise or chaos.  They don’t thrive on commotion.  They bloom when all is quiet and they can take the time they need to process life.  If you are having a stressed day and just want calm, call that introverted friend and hang out.  It’s like a spa rolled up in a person.

3.  They don’t mind when you cancel plans.

This is a big one for me.  I have zero sadness when you cancel plans with me.  You know why?  Bras.  If I had plans with you, chances are I have a babysitter.  A babysitter usually means Grandma or Auntie time.  Grandma or Auntie Time means empty house.  Your canceled plans equal jammie time and a good book.  Jammie time curled up with a book equals no bra required. It’s like freaking Christmas when you cancel, so don’t feel bad.

4.  If you want to know if you’ll like that book everyone’s been talking about, you almost never have to research it.

The majority of my time that isn’t spent carting teens from A to B is spent reading and writing.  As I age, what I read is becoming more diverse.  So save the data on your phone and just text me.  I’m quicker than Amazon when it comes to book reviews.

5.  They make excellent listeners.

Because they need to observe and process, introverts are the best listeners.  They will allow you to ramble on as long as you like without interruption.  Most of this is because they just can’t do the small talk thing.  They don’t care that the weather is too hot or too cold and they have no opinion on what the local sports team is up to.  They do, however, care that you are hurting and need someone to help you through a crisis.  In this way, they are the dogs of the human world, with less drool.  If you’re lucky.

6.  You are guaranteed a level of “special.”

Let’s face it.  When it comes to making friends, introverts are not the people you go to for advice.  They are pretty awful at it simply because they are deep end of the conversation pool people.  They are not comfortable with shallow relationships.  Count yourself very lucky to have an introvert as a friend.  If they call you friend, you must be pretty darn special.  And you will be that special friend for life.  Introverts do not invest time in someone they don’t intend to be around for a while.  And by “a while” I mean “until death.”  It’s a marriage of sorts.  Consider it an investment.

7.  They make excellent spies.

Introverts are the world’s most observant people.  Not much gets by them.  If you have a special someone you aren’t quite sure about, make them spend some time around your introverted friend. Introverts are people watchers by nature and they log all those little peccadilloes they see for later use, whether it be to help a girlfriend know she’s about to date a douchebag or to save for later when they write this shit down.

8.  They are great storytellers.

Alright, maybe not storytellers, but definitely writers.  All that listening, people watching, and down time results in a truly beautiful thing.  If you’re lucky, your introverted friend will pen an essay about that time you helped her peal out of an ex-douchebag’s driveway, spraying gravel to the four winds. She’ll tell you she loves you not on a phone and maybe not in person, but she will write you the most dazzling love letter you’ve ever received.

From their low maintenance demeanor to the “big picture” way their minds work, introverts truly make the best friends. You’ll have them for life.  They will always love you.  They may screen your calls until they can handle the chatter, but they will always be there for you.  What more could a friend ask for?

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Serious stuff

Somewhere in the middle

Today marks the three year anniversary of the death of Mary Ann.  She was a wonderful person and I admired and loved her so.  On this day, three years ago I penned this letter, words I couldn’t express to her in life.  I share them with you here, in her memory.mary ann  (Please forgive the formatting.  WordPress hates me.)

Mary Ann,
Just being born, our beginning, is a struggle that exhausts us and our mothers. Our death, our ending,  is heartbreaking to many. The focus of our lives, what makes the ending so difficult, lays somewhere in the middle.
It doesn’t just happen in one moment, but in an entire lifetime of moments that leave indelible marks on this world. The middle shapes the person we are as we grow. It shapes the lives of our children, which, in turn, shapes the lives of our grandchildren for generations to come. Our middles give small portions of ourselves to our fellow man, that they might find comfort in our words and actions.
It’s the middle that creates memories. It is the culmination of all the moments that we’ve loved, lost and risen to the occasion. It encompasses the happy, sad and all that was in between. It includes all the moments that we stood on our own two feet as well as those that knocked us to our knees, and shows our strength and perseverance. The middle is the meat of our lives and it stands as a testament of not just what we got out of life, but of what we gave back to it.
As much as it hurts, life’s end is also a beginning. It picks up where the middle left off. Our death is the beginning of our legacy. We spend the whole of our middles creating what we hope those who outlive us will take with them.
May your family and friends take a large portion of the laughter that was left to them. May they cling to the love with which they were so carefully endowed. May your memory be carried in their hearts forever.
More importantly, may you leave this world knowing that so many loved you, and their lives were made brighter by your presence in it.

Rest in peace, my friend.
Always,
Miranda

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